What Parent Type Are You?
1. Not all jobs are created with equal hours. Which of the following describes the work hours of you and your partner?
A. Only my partner works more than 50 hours per week.
B. Only my career requires that I work more than 50 hours per week.
C. Both my partner and I have jobs that require more than 50 hours of work per week.
D. Neither my partner nor I work more than 50 hours per week.
2. Families often find that travel can restrict the amount of time parents are at home. Which of the following applies to you?
A. Only my partner travels more than 4 days per month on average.
B. Only my career requires that I travel more than 4 days per month on average.
C. Both my partner and I have jobs that require more than 4 travel days per month on average.
D. Neither my partner nor I travel much for work.
3. Some factors that affect family life are less obvious than others. Which of these describes your commute?
A. Only my partner’s commute is more than 50 miles or one hour on average each way.
B. Only my career requires a commute of more than 50 miles or one hour on average each way.
C. Both my partner and I have jobs that require a commute of more than 50 miles or one hour on average each way.
D. Neither my partner nor I have a lengthy commute.
4. Some jobs require deploying or living apart from the family for lengthy periods of time as part of a military career, diplomacy, international assignments or remote construction. Which of the following describes your careers?
A. Only my partner’s work requires living apart from the family temporarily.
B. Only my career requires living apart from the family temporarily.
C. Both my partner and I have jobs that require living apart from the family temporarily.
D. Neither my partner nor I need to live apart from the family due to the nature of our work.
5. When family life gets stressful, something’s gotta give. Who is most likely to take off work to accommodate a sick child, a repairman or the needs of an extended family member?
B. My partner.
C. It is difficult for either of us to get away from work for family emergencies.
D. We take turns.
6. The division of housework and childcare is one of the most cited sources of arguments in families. Which of these best describes the division of labor at home for you and your partner?
A. I do 70% of the work or more and my partner does 30% or less.
B. My partner does70% of the work or more and I do 30% or less.
C. It feels like none of the work at home ever really gets done.
D. We aim for 50/50, but sometimes it is more like 60/40.
7. Extreme work demands sometimes shock friends and family. They tell the spouse of the extreme worker, “I could never do what you do!!” Who is more likely to hear that comment?
B. My partner.
C. We both hear it.
D. Neither. Our work hours are not extreme.
MUST HAVE PARENT
If you answered all As, you are a classic Must Have Parent. Welcome to the crowd! You are a father or mother who takes a greater share of responsibility for the family because your partner works an extreme job that demands long hours, mega travel, a crazy commute, deployment and/or living apart temporarily. You may also become an MHP because you have a child with special needs who requires more in terms of childcare or ferrying around to therapy appointments.
This means you hold down the fort for your family. You are the one who knows when band camp starts. You keep track of the shot records. You know the current shoe size of everyone in the family. This may not always seem fair, especially when it comes to your own career.
No worries. Our Must Have Parent skills will teach you how to manage your kids in less time, warm up your relationship and bring your Must Do partner back in the fold. Our goal is to make your life awesome. So like us on Facebook so that you can see all our new tips, tricks and skills every week. And check our most recent MHP skill here and see if it will help you today.
MUST DO PARENT
If you answered mostly Bs, you are a Must Do Parent. You are like 75 million Americans who support their families in jobs that demand long hours, mega travel, killer commutes, deployment or living apart from the family temporarily. You end up spending less time with the family NOT because you are selfish or immature, but because of the uncompromising nature of the work that you do. Thanks for that. This country needs people like you.
So does your family. At Must Have Parent, we know that small habits you develop now will bring you closer to your family forever. Check here to see if your profession is listed. And drop us a quick email at firstname.lastname@example.org to tell us about things that drive you crazy about family life. We can help with that.
DOUBLE DO PARENT
If you answered mostly C’s, you may be Double Do Parents—parents who both have Must Do jobs that require an extreme level of commitment. This is a tough one. This pattern of living requires master skills in negotiation, time management and parenting. You might even be considering a see-saw marriage in which one partner takes the lead in career one year while the other partner takes the lead the following year. Our Must Have Parenting skills can offer some skills you might adopt to make your own family run smoother and bring a little heat back into your relationship.
Check here to see if your Must Do Profession is listed. Then tell us your story here.
If you answered mostly Ds, you are Coparents. You and your partner seem to be achieving the dream of truly co-parenting. Neither of you has the demands of an extreme job. That does not mean that sometimes you don’t feel like you end up carrying more of the burden of parenting—because you probably do. Parenting is rarely 50/50 in this country. So check out our #MHPSkills blogs. These contain parenting tips that our MHPs use that may help you cut some of the frustration out of parenting s that you have more time to do the things you want to do.